Stop Pretending You Don’t Have Negative Emotions!

One thing that I have found is a common challenge on this path is that spiritually conscious people tend to not allow themselves to feel their negative emotions. They are strong, capable people who in general are very positive, yet in order to “stay positive” and have things “going good” they often ignore their emotions.

Sound familiar?

It is also a common fear that if you let yourself feel your negative emotions, you will plunge to the depths of them and never get out. That if you feel hurt by what someone says and you just let yourself feel it you are dwelling on it and it’s going to feel worse.

I really want to shed some light on this because it is one of the most damaging things I see spiritually conscious people tend to do to themselves. First, let’s look at what is really happening when you ignore or deny your emotions.

Do you often feel like people don’t seem to care about you as much as you want them to? About your needs and how you feel? Is your partner hurtful without realizing? Do you give so much and receive little in return?

These are all situations that you tend to attract when you are ignoring your negative emotions. And of course, this furthers the emotional denial because you are upset and it appears as though they are causing it… but they’re not. YOU are unconsciously.

Why does this happen?

Let’s go back to basic Law of Attraction, you attract what matches your energy.

By ignoring your negative emotions, what do you think is happening energetically?

You are saying that your feelings do not matter. It doesn’t matter that you’re hurt, sad, angry, in pain, heartbroken. You literally send out a vibrational message that you are not important and don’t matter.

So if that’s happening energetically, what do you think you attract?

People who tend to treat you as if you don’t matter, they don’t consider your feelings or needs. Or, you attract this behavior from the people in your life, even if they don’t mean to be like this.

And, by the way, if you are not allowing yourself to feel a negative emotion, you may think you are tricking the Law of Attraction but you’re not. You attract what matches your ENERGY. If you allow your emotions to flow, they dissipate, if you deny them, they become a part of your energy field and you attract more that matches them.

But the good news is that you can turn this around, and it doesn’t have to be as difficult as you think.

Now I want to be clear up front that I am suggesting this for everyday situations where you are experiencing a not-too-deep or intense negative emotion. Deeper negative emotions tend to point to stronger, deeper energetic patterns. I don’t suggest you try to make those go away by just feeling them as they are energetically anchored into your energy field and they are there for a reason you must resolve before they will release. I prefer an easier way to shift old patterns and that is using my Intuitive Healing Process. Or if you feel it may be a psychological issue, definitely seek professional help to get through it so you can get to a place of honoring yourself and feeling your emotions as you can see it is very important!

So, let’s shift the energy around this so you can be attracting better treatment from those in your life and so you can begin to feel important, honored and valued.

It all starts with you and how you treat yourself, when I say express your emotions, I mean get them out. This doesn’t mean everyone needs to know what your emotions are, again, this centers around YOU and I don’t even care if you’re the only one who knows about them at this point. In fact, it can feel good to get your negative emotions out on paper then rip it up and dispose of it, it’s a freeing experience!

Now first, I want to go back to the fear most people have, that if you let yourself feel your negative emotions you will be consumed by them. I have found that if your intention beforehand is to honor yourself and to feel better in doing so, the more you allow yourself to feel your emotions, the more they just dissipate as you get to the depths of them! Okay, so next time you feel a slightly negative emotion coming up, instead of just brushing it off or pretending you’re fine, here’s what I want you to do:

1. Stop and give yourself some quiet time to yourself and get out your journal. Even a piece of paper will do if you don’t have a journal yet, you can even throw it away after if you don’t want anyone to see it. The point is not to have a record of your emotions, the point is to EXPRESS your emotions.

2. Start out by setting an intention or asking for support, silently or on paper. This can go something like “Please help me to honor myself and my emotions and to get to a place of feeling better”, or “I intend to go higher.” This can really make the time you spend most effective so you don’t feel like you’re dwelling on your negative emotions. You are not doing this to punish yourself, you are doing it to HONOR yourself.

3. You can also imagine yourself surrounded by the light of your Higher Self or Source, so that as you allow yourself to face your emotions, you are allowing a higher vibration to replace them. If your negative emotions are like a dark room, you are surrounding that dark room with light and by allowing yourself to feel them you are in essence opening the door and allowing the light to flood in.

4. Start writing out how you feel. You can even start your sentence off with “I feel…” and go from there. And as you are writing, let yourself FEEL your negative emotions. Don’t just write and focus on how others are behaving, that’s not the point, the point is to feel your emotions so they can begin to dissipate. And again, the point is also to honor yourself and send out the vibration of “my feelings are important, I am important!”

5. Continue until you feel relief and you feel a bit lighter.

6. Once you feel some relief, celebrate that you have taken a big step by honoring yourself and your emotions!

7. To end on a positive note, begin to write about how you want to feel and as you do, allow yourself to feel these positive, good-feeling emotions.

Making yourself a priority and honoring yourself and your emotions is an important part of your journey. This shift to allowing yourself to feel your emotions is one of the most important one you can make, and until you show you’re important you can’t attract different from others!


Copyright 2009 Fia Crandall